What a long freakin out day

Finally had to break down and admit that Ro needs to be in daycare for at least 4 hours a day. This is so I don't lose my mind, but it's also for his safety and mental growth. And so that I can clean and study uninterrupted. I feel like I've failed somehow but I also know that with BPD, you don't get to choose how you act sometimes and it is not always safe for others. FML.